Juicing and Raw Foods: Food Inc

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The Daily Messenger: Love of Truth

The Daily Messenger: Love of Truth: For The Love of Truth: In real truth, there is no lie. In real truth, there’s no deception. In real truth, it doth iniquity defy. I...

Food for Thought

 For the purposes of this argument, we shall assume that God does in fact exist and we shall assume that the Devil exists. Because God is the source of good then the Devil is the source of Evil. To compare a principality against a being is unfair, so we shall therefore compare both the two beings and also the principalities that they manifest. I shall analyze from a Christian religion stand point because it is the one with which I am well versed and also because it is the one that is most problematic and arguable. What is the origin of Evil? It is widely believed that the Devil is the origin of evil because it is through the serpent that he seduced Eve and then Adam to eat the fruit. It is the Devil who was thrown out of heaven for his own pride and evil and his attempt to overthrow God. Let us assume this is all true, and that Evil did have a source. And now the source is from within each of us as it was from within Lucifer. Therefore we establish that each human being has the equal potential for both good and evil. 

 Let us now briefly compare the two beings, God and the Devil. They are opposites, but the problem in the existence of both is one created the other. By God creating Lucifer, he had to be aware of the potential for Lucifer's evil. And therefore he created Lucifer knowing what he would do and become. I believe that he proceeded with the creation of Lucifer because each being is given an equal chance at the righteous path. I fully believe that the only reason evil exists at all is because of the compassion and love God has for everyone, demon and angel alike. Because each of us is allowed not just a second chance, but an uncountable amount of chances until the final day of judgement. Rather than cruelly condemn a being for an evil act that in the comparison of our life span is a drop in the ocean, he has compassion and allows the "evil being" to continue in its existence in the hope that it will find it's way to God.

 This then brings up another question. Because we have all entertained the thought thus far by assuming certain things as true let us then expand our minds and assume another harder idea. If each human being is given the same amount of unlimited chances as the devil, the devil holds the advantage because his life span is much greater than our own. Let us then assume that reincarnation is a fact, and that each seperate human life we endure as a soul is tallied up on the scoreboard of our existences. This then evens the playing field a bit. But Nick, you might ask, why should we assume that reincarnation is a fact from a christian stand point? Just because you say so? I shall respond that no, there is precedence. Peter asked Jesus about a blind man, "Master, is it by his sin or by his parents that he was born blind?" And Jesus answered, "Neither, it is for the glory of god that he was born blind." How in the world could it be his own sins that would have caused him to be born blind? The answer is that the sins of our past lives follow us and we are made to atone for them. This in turn would explain why so many tragedies occur every day to infants and children all over the world who are seemingly completely innocent. If an infant dies at childbirth then it is a blessing. A blessing compared to a child that has to indure autism or another mental handicap. All of this is rather lengthy and arguable but at least you can see why I would ask to assume that reincarnation is a fact. Let us charge forward!

 Now to compare the two principalities. We see that evil by it's nature is a judgement. What some may consider good and what is evil differ from person to person. What is fact is that God as the ultimate deity has the harshest standards because he uses his own perfection as a measuring stick. However Christ made clear that God also judges with compassion taking everyone's own unique situations and weighing them with the circumstances. Why do people constantly seek forgiveness from God or shun it? If you ask why does God allow evil to exist? Then you should fairly ask why does God allow you or me to exist? Everyone seems to want the double standards when it comes to themselves. "He who is without sin may throw the first stone" How can a person easily condemn "evil" people when they themselves are not perfect. Also my final point and the one I consider to be the hay-maker, the coup de gras so to speak. Whose to say that God isn't eradicating evil? Who is to say that he is not destroying demons who have gone too far as you read this? Because God is all knowing he would know exactly when a fire would rage through a small village killing half of the populace and destroying the lives of all, he would most certainly arrange for it that everyone affected would by some sin in this life or another need to pay for said sin. Just because God has the power to create terrible events of "The Flood" levels doesn't mean he alone is responsible for every natural disaster, because God made nature the way it is he would have made it self sustaining and maybe even sentient. And finally who is to say that God doesn't stop a tsunami that would kill hundreds of thousands?? Because it is stopped you never knew it was coming. Its like on the news how they always report violence and crime, so you don't know about the heroes of the world because it isn't reported. Food for thought. 

Nick Bradley

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The Daily Messenger: Welcome to the Honest Food Guide

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Surfer Bro Nick

Nick is a soul surfer

Surfing Sunboy: Surfer Dude

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Surfing Sunboy: Surfer Dude

Surfing Sunboy: Surfer Dude:  Don heading out of a shortboard 

bro punishment

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Rule 16

16) A bro will never make another bro look bad in front of a target girl. The wing man should swiftly punish any such attempts. Afterwards the bro who infringed upon this rule may be confronted by the whole circle of bros.

The bro code is an epic set of guidelines by which bros may exist by. Its like a set of rules that a tribe lives by. In fact, you and your bros are a tribe. A bro-tribe! Therefore when a bro is has thought highly enough of a chick to bring her to be showcased and evaluated by his bros, every bro present shall do his best.

The bro code at its simplest, is fairly looking out for your bro's well being and general health. Therefore a violation of rule 16 should be punished harshly because dude that just sucks and is not cool. A bro should always be looking for ways to help his bros score, not to ruin their chances of it whenever possible. 

A violation of rule 16 should be forgiven a few times, but after that they must not be allowed to participate in situations where their behavior has proven to be destructive to the plan. Basically, a dude who cock blocks when he shouldn't repeatedly, should not be given any opportunities to cock block again. 

Because the love among bros should outlast any event, especial if the foul was made when the bro was drunk, that all bros forgive and forget. There are bros who continually screw your game up for you and they aren't even drunk. These bros should still be loved, but just not allowed to be around for such events. 

Basically, if you know for a certainty your bro is gonna cock block, don't let him be there. This however should not be necessary. A good wing man will handle all of these events on the fly, and make sure that his bro has nothing but green lights. 

When good game is combined with a solid wing man, the bro has no worries. So consider having pregame talks with your bros, and especially make sure your wing man knows what needs to be done. There is only so much a bro can do in the end, and when a bro is rejected he shall always endeavor to blame himself before blaming his bros, preferably he would blame the chick first and foremost. 

Consolidate all rejections of your bros with lots of beer, bros love beer. When a bro gets out of a relationship whether he was dumped or not, give him lots of hugs and beer and spend some time with him. Bros have bros for a reason, so remember to always be there for your bros.

Women, for pity's sake, don't DRIVE!

Surfing Sunboy: Surfer Bro Nathan

Surfing Sunboy: Surfer Bro Nathan

Remembering what's important

phoning home...

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Bro Foul punishment

Satanist leftards persecuting honest minds and hearts unto death

Being a male in our day, geting screwed or else no boom boom. Ever.

The SuperBowl

Many of you may or may not have just recently watched the Superbowl. Many of you who just recently watched it may or may not have partied particularly hard. I however, performed the latter. And now that I am home, safe, and drunk, lets talk about the Superbowl.

The game in and of itself may or may not have been very important to you. Personally for me and who I was with here in California, the game was pretty much meaningless, besides of course the bets we placed on the games outcome. We mostly played beerpong and did shots and spent time with our friends.

Above all else we spent time with out bros. Superbowl Sunday is one of the all time bro days, even if your girlfriend is with you or not. Even if your not into sports that much at all (like me) today was a huge day for sitting back and hanging out with the guys talking about whatever while the game is on.

Many of you bros may have had to work on this normal Sunday made important by corporate America. Hell I even ran into a few bros I knew working at the local round table when I went to get a bite to eat. But for those of you lucky enough to have had the freedom and drinks to party hard today, I hope you did it according to the brocode!

Today I observed many actual interactions of the brocode and absolutely no infractions of it. I took care of my bros and made sure they had tons of fun, while also making sure they didn't drink too much. Today was not a day for wingmen and nailing down some good looking girls for me and my bros. Today was a day of bro-like solidarity and having a multitude of good laughs together!

We here at the brocode blog hope that all of you had as much fun as we did today. Remember bros, the brocode is not just a set of rules. It is a higher way of life by which all things are made awesome!

Beerpong or Bropong?

see more Bros

Now make me a sandwich!

that's not the way to the kitchen...

Rule 15

15) If a bro is terrible at sports, excuses may be made, no matter how bad they are. Good bros will start to play worse so that their bro doesn’t look so bad.

The inner workings that comprise the backbone of this rule are based upon the well founded beliefs that not every bro has to be a sports douche. Being a bro is recognizing the bond of awesomeness between a dude and his dudes. It is not a label upon which to slap merchandise and douche slurs to. 

It is highly common to even observe a guy a wearing a certain style of clothing and acting a certain way, and you make a mental note that this guy looks like a bro. All the No Fear clothing and Rock Star energy drinks does not make a guy a bro. It just shows that he has an identity crisis that he is dealing with.

Bros be forewarned of this type of behavior! Your fellow bros will always have your back even if you decide to change how you do things and what you wear. But seriously, don't be a douche. Just be yourself.

A bro does not have to be a sports fan, or be good at sports, or even be able to hold his liquor. A bro does just have to be awesome. Playing a sport is an awesome pass time with your friends and doesn't always have to be a competition. Therefore bros, have a heart and look out for your bros out on the field/court/surf. 

And above all else, if the chicks are watching and a bro isn't particularly good at a sport, "its not my day" is the only acceptable excuse to be made. A bad ass dude doesn't even make that beta-male apology.

Keep the peace my bros!

The unspoke rule

Be kind...

Rule 14

14) A bro shall never make another bro ashamed for hooking up with a girl. Even if she was truly nasty, a bro will make excuses for his bro. Example, “you were drunk so…”

Sometimes dudes just slum it. And by sluming it we mean that they don't just bend their standards a bit, they really ignore them. We are talking about doing something with someone when under normal circumstances it would never happen. Monogamy and fidelity are all well and good virtues that are still valued by a fair number in our time and more so when long term relationships are concerned. But in the dating world when you are young, sleeping around is the thing.

Each generation is more messed up than the last from someone's viewpoint, always. Understand that you and your bros are young and living the life (under 35 and single). Cherish it and have fun, everyone knows to do this. So when your bro hooks up with a girl, thou shalt not give him shit for it lest shit be given upon you. 

There are few reasons a bro might slum it, many of them previously discussed on this blog. One is beer goggles. It is a well known fact that things look way more awesome when you're drunk. That nasty, greasy pizza. The girl that never had a boyfriend throughout high school and is now being flirty with you at the party. 

There are things that people don't normally do because of common sense and prior reasoning that they do a lot under the influence. AKA Stupid shit. The phrase "stupid shit" covers everything from streaking to sluming it. 

So even if shes hot or not, don't ever give your bro crap for his dating choices. Sober or not you must always have your bros back. If you feel you need to bring one of your bros errors into the light then do so discreetly, and if you are a blundering ass then at least have the common sense to pull him aside and keep it private. 

Remember bros, your message may be righteous but if your delivery of the message is terrible than your bro won't hear it. Speak the truth, but speak it in a language that gets heard. AKA being a cocky douche may get you chicks, but being awesome and understanding with your bros is what counts. 

Keep the peace my bros, and party hard this weekend!

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The Daily Messenger: Power lines and people

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This bro, has gone too far

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The Daily Messenger: The VFW

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Irony

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Rule 12

12) A bro will never ask for gas money for a ride unless he truly is hard up, or the ride exceeds the distance of 20 miles.

Bros will always wave the costs of things when it concerns their fellow bros. This includes anything from buying party equipment to covering your bro the difference on a purchase he was short on. Therefore good bros always wave gas money even when hitting up the gas station so they can drive around for the night. 

The bro in question who is driving may take offered gas money at any time as per his bro discretionary judgement. But the same bro should not ask for gas money if it is not offered without provocation unless  as per the above criteria, he is hard up or the destination exceeds 20 miles. If the distance is more than 20 miles than it is safely outside of the stomping grounds of your bros. 

And is therefore almost a road trip of sorts. If the distance is more than 20 miles good bros will preempt you and offer gas bucks, if they don't then your totally good to ask for it. It is perfectly acceptable in these situations to ask your bros to help make sure the whole car thing isn't entirely on you. 

If you're a bro who is truly tight on cash, but you really don't wanna miss out on the hangout at wherever and your one of the only drivers. Ask for cash, its OK man. We won't judge you for doing it. But if you just got paid and you pull one of these, bros will laugh at you. 

Be a good bro... my bros! Do whats right by your bros at all times as per the bro code and you shall always prevail! This is part of the bro code, it helps separate the men from the boys, and the bros from douches. 

Bro Foul

1950's TV Ad

This could be you, bro, if you're not careful

Save the internets!

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TFS DBZ Abridged

Bro Michael kicking Nephillim butt

Rule 11

11) A bro will never ever leave his bros without a ride. A bro may never be allowed to walk alone more than 2 blocks.

This rule is of course, just being a good bro. Those bros who have vehicles in their possession  should at all times share the wealth and drive. It is more than acceptable to suggest another mode of transport however if a bro should be low on gas. Walking is great to avoid the wasting of gas, and it also happens to be healthy, unless you get hit by a car. 

Therefore a bro may not be allowed to walk more than 2 blocks by himself. If a bro intends to do this, pick him up, or walk with him. The world is a wide place, and there are many things a person misses out on by choosing to walk or ride. 

Walking forces bros to slow down, and take in the scenery around them. You may meet people you would not have met if you drove and see things and do things that otherwise would not have been. Driving however affords the luxury of the car stereo, and the comfort of sitting. Driving allows bros to get to farther distances at an obviously greater speed.

Therefore it is good bro practice to walk when you can, to save gas and be healthy. And save all of the driving for when its needed. Example being to reach that one party your coworker is throwing on the other end of town. 

Keep the stoke my bros!

Surfer Bros...

Rule 10

10) When a bro asks a bro what he thinks of his girlfriend or date, a bro is always required to give an honest answer. The phrase, “I’d bang her” is off limits.

A bro must needs be absolutely honest with his bros at all times. The things that raise bros above chicks is the absolute honesty and trust between bros. It is entirely possible that your bro may ask you what you think of his girlfriend or date. Despite what you might say to protect his feelings or anything, you must always give the most honest answer you can.

A bro should be able to rely on his bros to hear the most absolute truth available and garner valuable opinions from them. If a bro is looking for you to consolidate his choices by hearing some wishy-washy stuff, then slap him in the face with an ice cold glass of reality.

I have seen too many bros go to their trusted bros for their honest opinions and advice only to be confronted with shameless white lies that do nothing but help a bro twist the reality of a relationship. If you observe as a solid fact that your bro is being tied down with a less than desirable woman for whatever flaws in her character, then it is your duty as a bro to tell him whats up.

Leave nothing unsaid when doing this. Let your bros have the full measure if the truth, if a bro proceeds to ignore the truth in favor of his own delusions rather than the reality that is, then there's not much you can do at that point.

Its a sad truth in our time, that people remain in unhealthy relationships because they do not perceive the reality of it. They are blinded by what they want the relationship to be. Either by their own desperation and need for love, or by their own pure stupidity. 

Therefore this rule is in place to ensure that all bros will dish out the truth. The phrase, "I'd bang her" is off limits because dude that is just not cool bro.

Peace bros

When bros get mad!

see more epicfails

Rule 9

9) When a bro is showing his bro’s his new ride, he is always required to open the hood and showcase the contents. All bros present are required to admire the content, even if they know nothing about cars.

This is good bro practice because every man in the world should know how to tinker with their vehicle. Its just good game, to be able to take care of your own ride, and show off your skill and prowess with something that boggles the minds of others. Because all bros should know something about cars means that all bros must show around what is under their hoods.

Even though all bros should be mechanically minded doesn't mean that they are. In fact the opposite is true, most bros know almost nothing about cars. And even though these bros know absolutely nothing about that which is their transportation, their pride, and their joy; they like to pretend they know all there is to know. 

Therefore, when a bro gets a new ride and showcases the ride and the contents of the hood to his bros, admiration of said car and contents is required. If there should be one or two bros there who do know what the hell that shiny chrome part does, they shall not be absolute D-bags and ruin it for everyone. 

The reason that every bro should be able to rip out and install a new transmission in his primary vehicle is for many reasons. 1) the sheer badassness of being able to do this sort of thing is pretty cool. 2) In the future, should you for whatever reason have your car break down, it'll be totally awesome to show off to your girl/bros that you know why it broke, and how to fix it. 3) Don't get reamed by mechanics when your car does eventually break down.

A bro should always endeavor to be the very best in whatever he puts his mind to. The complacent loser like mindset that is the backsliding of the average American male stops with you my bros. Just because you endeavor to succeed doesn't mean you cant just chill out and relax, it just means that when you go to work on something, you play for keeps.

Keep the stoke bros, and don't let party stop!

Tennis Ball

1950's coke commercial

Rule 8

8) Love thy father and mother. A bro will never ever get with a bro’s biological mother or sister. Step sisters and mothers are fair game.

Rule 8 is almost two rules in one. One being part of the ten commandments, and the other being a known bro code rule. You don't crap where you eat. Therefore a bros biological mother and sister are off limits at all times. Commenting that a mother or sister is hot, is however allowed. A bro should not be offended by any comments like this because why not.

However, step-sisters and step-moms are fair game! If you can bag one then by all means do as you please. A bro will not be offended if you should be successful but you should make him aware of your intentions ahead of time. So that he will have ample time to become very drunk to receive the news of your success. 

This rule doesn't require much of an explanation because it is quite obvious to any one with a reasonable  intelligence what the rule is all about. What sets bros apart from chicks is the severe lack of drama. Bros don't do drama, we avoid it all costs. The breaking of this rule is bound to cause some measure of drama and therefore should not be done.

Keep the peace my bros, be successful and party hard!

Where\s my cane and hearing aid? What's that you say, you whipper snapper!?

I weep for your generation... However, I realize that deep down, most all understand that life, people, and circumstances are much deeper and have a great deal more meaning  that is revealed for the 21st century twenty-somethings.

Be interesting to see what you do with what's in front of you. If anything.

Rule 7

7) A bro must always respect another bro’s car, house, and parents.

A good bro should always treat another bro's car, house, and parents as his own. This is almost like the golden rule that they pound into the heads of grade school children. Treat people as you wish to be treated. A bro who is always disrespecting your car, home and family is no bro at all.

I was once at a small party. And everyone I brought with me was showing ultimate respect for the home and the people who lived there. Taking off your shoes when entering the home, double flushing, doing everything possible to keep things clean. These are just a few good bro practices. If for whatever reason you have a bro who is being some what of an ass, then evict him from the party. Shut that stuff down wherever it should arise.

I have also seen bros with immaculate, beautiful looking cars, as well as horribly trashed looking cars. The immaculate cars stayed immaculate because the owner endeavored to keep it looking good and so did his bros. While the trashed car was trashed by the owner and his bros.

A good way to signal to your bros that they should respect your property is by respecting it yourself. If you take very good care of an object then likewise so shall your bros. If a bro should disrespect your property, all that may be needed for reprimanding him is a, "not cool bro, now clean it up."

Go forth my bros, keep the peace and party hard!

A news report on the rape of bros

Rule 6

6) When a bro pays for all the alcohol for an occasion himself, this must be made known to all present and made out to be the greatest feat ever observed in human history. A bro may skip out on kicking in for beer if he has done this recently.

Kindness among bros and among the general population of earth should always be encouraged. Just this morning I was stuck in morning traffic waiting to make a turn. And this totally chill bro stopped, for no apparent reason, and allowed me to make my turn risk free. He was by no means obligated to do this and it wasn't convenient for him, this made him a good bro.

I acknowledged his kindness with a bro nod of respect and a wave. So understandably, when a bro goes out of his way to spend his hard earned bills to treat for alcohol for the night, it is a great thing! Appreciation for such and act can be shown in any way a bro may see fit. But when someone does do this, we can notice a lot of respect and new phraseology in the conversation for the rest of the night.

We start to see things like, "dude, can I have one of your beers?" Phrases like this stay in the conversation even after the bro who treated has claimed a number of times, "go ahead man, I bought this for all of us, you don't have to ask."

This is good bro-man-ship. And it has already been stated that the bro code and common courtesy go hand in hand. A bro who takes it upon himself to exact a personal toll on his wallet for his bros is showing lots of love, so remember bros, show the love back.

It is recommended that bros should be on the lookout for any leaches in the group. Someone who continually refuses to contribute or even show proper gratitude. One should not feel morally obligated to placate this kind of behavior, a bro should always call another bro out on his bull shit. Only when there aren't any chicks around of course.

As always my bros, go forth with your internal and written wisdom that is the bro code. Keep the stoke and remember that the bro code is what separates a true man from the beasts (and the chicks).

Brohemian Rhapsody

Baby Bro Pro

Rule 5

5) You must always do whatever is in your power to stop a bro from soiling himself with a poor looking girl. Unless the bro is able to stand up, look you in the eye, and articulate that he is to a decent extent sober. Then you are absolved of any responsibility.

Sometimes, you see a bro trying to get with a girl at a party or something, and you know shes just bad news. Either because you bro has beer goggles and wouldn't touch this chick if he was sober, or that shes obviously reeling him in to be her new emotional tampon. The designated cock-blocker and all bros present should do whatever is in their power to stop such an event.

But if your bro wont be deterred and has expressed he is sober by the above criteria, then whatever happens isn't your problem anymore. Because my bros, a bro should always look out for his bro. And if a bro should so insist on a rash action, then step back and let him have his way. A good bro should continue keeping a watchful eye on the situation, just in case you do catch a really good reason to break it up.

The good bro in question, is of course, the wing man. Ah there it is again. The wing man, coming into the blog post like a haunting nightmare or a knight in shining armor. As may be observed by the common reader (or maybe the un-common reader, I don't know what kind of freaky stuff your in to) a massive amount of bro code responsibility falls on the shoulders of the wing man. This because, bros seem to love to party it up, and guzzle large quantities of alcohol, and when these things happen, mistakes will be made.

Sometimes it is acceptable to allow a bro to "slum it" with a less than desirable woman, this can be done for a numerical quantity no longer specifiable by SOPA that directly correlates to days spent in a dry spell. Sometimes, (and I know this sounds bad but all you bros are thinking it) a bro just needs to get laid. Other times a bro needs to slum it to possibly renew his self-confidence or his drive to achieve a hotter class of chick.

The beauty of rule 5 is in its simplicity and its broad relation to a number of possibilities. With rule 5 in place, a bro is protected to an extent stopped only by his own severe stupidity. If it should come to your attention that your bro is intending to have unprotected sex with a random girl (random-ness indicated by how much everyone knows the girl in question) then it is the duty of every bro present to supply your bro with protection.

If no protection is found to be given, then the intended sex can not be allowed to happen. For this reason a good bro always keeps two condoms in his wallet, one for his bro, and one for himself. Or dam if conditions are good then you got two condoms to use!

As always my bros, take the wisdom of the bro code and go forth, spread the power that is and prosper. (also it should be mentioned that all bros believe Clint Eastwood, William Shatner, and Bob Marley to be extreme badasses of Legendary proportions)

Rule 4

4) When a bro designates you as his wingman, you may not fail him. This is the most important role a bro may play for a bro, and may not be violated or debauched.

Rule 4 may seem like a repetition of Rule 3. But a necessary repetition it is. As stated in the post about rule 3, the wing man is the highest honor and sign of trust that can be bestowed from one bro to another.   No other higher honor exists. 

To fail a bro as a wing man is terrible failure. I have seen it done. The costs are great, because when a wing man is designated it is because a wing man is needed. The feeling of a guilt a bro would feel for failing a bro pales in comparison to the guilt from failing as wing man.

To fail at rule 4 is to fail at rule 1, rule 3, and probably fail at life. Honor the bro code and the sacred trust of the wing man. Keep the rules and you shall prosper as bros. 

Rule 3

3) You are only obligated to wing man for one bro per social event, after that the bro is on his own.

This rule is in place to protect the wing man from abuse. And may only apply to the change of setting. The theory behind such a rule is that being a wing man for your bro for any length of time is a full time job. And any distractions from the job can lead to crucial failures at times. So, for instance, if your group decides to leave one bar for another, or hit up that banging party down the street, your bro must designate a new wing man. 

Once the setting changes your bro is required to find a new wing man, freeing the previous wing man to hit on chicks or just enjoy the night. If however you wish to sign on for another term as wing man, that is entirely at your discretion. 

Being a wing man for your bro is a time honored and highly valued position. It is a sacred trust among bros. When a bro asks you to be his wing man, it is a way of saying that at that exact moment in time, you are the one he trusts the most. Not all bros have excellent game, or can even multitask. Thus the wing man was born, to free a bro up from all responsibilities that may distract him from his girl. 

Being a wing man is no light thing. The acceptance of such trust is a heavy responsibility. By accepting the position, you designate that come what may you will remain sober and alert enough to handle everything. "Everything" literally means everything. From another drunk bro throwing up, to your bro's girl's annoying friends, to making sure that one guy you brought with you doesn't get you kicked out.

Many successful missions as a wing man is a glorious thing. To know that it was you who was the papa bro-bear for the night. To know that you diverted and avoided any and all catastrophes, and that single handed, you managed to remain sober enough to do all of this.

A wing man is the guy who made sure that "night to remember" was memorable in all the good ways. A shout out to all you bros who don't grip or whine about the wing man duties. You sirs, are truly good bros. 

Rule 2

2) When your bro’s girlfriend inquires about his whereabouts you know nothing, always.

Many girls and girlfriends will be offended by this rule. And many more Femi-Nazi women will use this rule as an excuse to go on a rant about how all men are chauvinistic pigs. So with that disregarded, lets dive face first in to the reasoning for this rule in the bro code of life.

This rule is a fundamental bro code rule in anyone's bro code book, because it just seems to be good bro-manship. For instance, if your bro is a guy who dates or cheats around a lot, and one of his girlfriends calls you asking where he is. Your answer could potentially endanger their relationship. So the best answer is that "I don't know" and this is the best answer to avoid all the drama that would be involved.

If a bro needs a friend to cover for him, he would let you know ahead of time, that should his girlfriend call you, to claim that you are with him. This is where things become morally unclear for bros. The fundamental life question, "is this the right thing to do?" If you don't feel comfortable blatantly lying for your bro, warn him of this. If he is truly a good bro he will not ask you to do something that is against your moral code.

Bros be warned, if another bro tries to guilt you into covering for him, then he is by no means a good bro. There are many different levels of bro-dom, and what you may be willing to do for a bro who has stood by you many years, you may not be willing to do for a bro you rarely see.

When a bro is up to something that he wishes to hide from his girlfriend, if he is a good bro he will either inform you that you may be called or keep you in the dark entirely. This is great bro-manship because if you are in the dark you can freely claim you know nothing of his whereabouts. And if you are forewarned then you may protect your bro as you see fit.

The bro code blog does not advocate the life style of a sleezebag. We do however condone the protection of a bro. Drama avoided by a bro being busted for whatever reason, is a good thing. As a free and true bro you have the right to pick and choose your friends. Should you choose to be around losers then so be it. The Bro Code Rules are the same no matter what.

The Daily Messenger: Big Banking...

The Daily Messenger: Big Banking...

Part of the bro code is looking out for your bros and inversely looking out for yourself as well. This blog I linked to makes very realistic statements about our world today. Be armed with the truth my bros.

Rule 1

The bro code. Where did it come from? What does it mean? How does it alter the actions that person would normally make without it?

The answer is, that it does not alter a persons actions. The bro code has always existed since the beginning of the male social circle. In the heart of every man is written his own moral compass. Each person is raised with sense of what is right and what is wrong, and a guidance system to know the difference. Also known as your conscience. This fundamental sense of good and bad is what fathered the bro code.

Rule 1) You must always have your bro’s back. No exceptions.

At first glance a person may think this refers to protecting a fellow bro in a pride or pain battle via fisticuffs. That person would be wrong. It is commonly believed that the number one golden rule of the bro code is "bros over hoes" and this belief is also wrong.

A true bro does not live his life by demeaning the female character and elevating his own ego to the point of "I'm better than everyone else." Rule 1 is in place to show that the true meaning and purpose of the bro code is the unity and strength between two such bros.

A few bros who follow the bro code to its highest moral intent should be able to overcome anything from drama to boredom to the zombie apocalypse. And in case you didn't notice those zombies are coming sooner than expected.

This Rule is further extrapolated to the meaning that whatever endeavor your bro should choose to undertake, he needs your support. For example, a change of major, or career choice.

A superior bro code will overcome everything from a horrible family life to a girlfriend from hell.

It should be mentioned here that the bro code is a bridge built to meet in the middle from the sides. That is to say that if only one bro is following the code, the bro-ship will only last for so long.

The Bro Code

1) You must always have your bro’s back. No exceptions.

2) When your bro’s girlfriend inquires about his whereabouts you know nothing, always.

3) You are only obligated to wingman for one bro per social event, after that the bro is on his own.

4) When a bro designates you as his wingman, you may not fail him. This is the most important role a bro may play for a bro, and may not be violated or debauched.

5) You must always do whatever is in your power to stop a bro from soiling himself with a poor looking girl. Unless the bro is able to stand up, look you in the eye, and articulate that he is to a decent extent sober. Then you are absolved of any responsibility.

6) When a bro pays for all the alcohol for an occasion himself, this must be made known to all present and made out to be the greatest feat ever observed in human history. A bro may skip out on kicking in for beer if he has done this recently.

7) A bro must always respect another bro’s car, house, and parents.

8) Love thy father and mother. A bro will never ever get with a bro’s biological mother or sister. Step sisters and mothers are fair game.

9) When a bro is showing his bro’s his new ride, he is always required to open the hood and showcase the contents. All bros present are required to admire the content, even if they know nothing about cars.

10) When a bro asks a bro what he thinks of his girlfriend or date, a bro is always required to give an honest answer. The phrase, “I’d bang her” is off limits.

11) A bro will never ever leave his bros without a ride. A bro may never be allowed to walk alone more than 2 blocks.

12) A bro will never ask for gas money for a ride unless he truly is hard up, or the ride exceeds the distance of 20 miles.

13) When gas money for a ride is offered, it may be accepted. Use your own bro-judgment to determine if you should accept.

14) A bro shall never make another bro ashamed for hooking up with a girl. Even if she was truly nasty, a bro will make excuses for his bro. Example, “you were drunk so…”

15) If a bro is terrible at sports, excuses may be made, no matter how bad they are. Good bros will start to play worse so that their bro doesn’t look so bad.

16) A bro will never make another bro look bad in front of a target girl. The wingman should swiftly punish any such attempts. Afterwards the bro who infringed upon this rule may be confronted by the whole circle of bros.

17) A bro will always ask around before taking the last of anything. If a bro should ask you if its alright, unless the need is great or direct ownership is applied, you will let him have it. Common courtesy and the bro code go hand in hand.

18) A chick may be included in the bro code if she has proven herself worthy via general bro concession.

19) A chick may never be informed of the sacred rules of the bro code. A chick may be treated as a bro but never told of the rules. When reprimanding a girl for an infringement of the bro code, say “its just common courtesy.”

20) A bro will never let another bro drive drunk. Space must always be found or made for a drunk bro who needs to leave. If necessary, the theft of phone and keys shall be done for his own good. (exception: a designated group drunk driver exists, this bro has mastered the art of driving under the influence and has proven his worth)

21) A bro will never allow another bro to drunk dial or txt a girl. No exceptions to this rule. When a bro is truly smashed and his girl calls, the phone will be confiscated until a sober state of mind is achieved.

22) If a bro’s girlfriend calls you and asks about a bros actions the previous night, (I.e. the bro claimed to be sleeping at a friend’s house) you will always claim that yes he was there and you may even claim he is still there. Studies show that 8 out of 10 bros will do this without thinking. The other 2 bros claimed he was still with them but unavailable to talk.

23) You will always make excuses for a bros actions, no matter how obscene. All things done by a drunk bro must be forgiven. No exceptions.

24) A bro should always be allowed to make amends for his actions.

25) A bro will always give his bro’s girl a ride to wherever, so long as restitutions are made for the action.

26) A bro will never give detail when describing a sexual encounter. Doing so will force your bro to imagine you naked and this is unforgivable.

27) A bro will always do his best to help another bro’s self esteem. The Alpha-Bro should always be handing out the wisdom and power of his skill. A bro will always recognize the master seducer of the group.

28) A bro should never ever under any circumstances sleep with a bro’s ex-girlfriend. A bro may proceed to make moves on another bro’s failed target (he got rejected) but only after asking permission first. If the bro declines your invitation to bust some moves, you must adhere to his wishes and find a new target.

29) If permission for rule 28 has been given by a bro, and success is evident for yourself. One must always put it down to it being the girl’s preference and not due to your superior abilities. If a bro proceeds to become butt-hurt about your success where he failed, you are under no obligations to make him feel better or apologize for your success.

30) A bro will always take care of a bro who is blacked out, throwing up, and incase parents or girlfriend call. If a bro’s parents demand he comes home immediately, one will immediately allow him to use a shower and whatever else is necessary to make sure a bro receives no enemy fire on the home front.

31) A bro will always tell a bro what he did when he was blacked out. No matter how bad.

32) A bro must always maintain a safe physical distance from a bro’s girl, especially when drinking. Physical contact may only be made with a bro’s girl, when saying good bye. No exceptions.

33) A bro will always do his best to stop a bro from getting tattoos. A bro’s skin is the largest organ he has and the second most important. Especially if the tattoo is of a girl. Chicks will dump you and play with your heart, but a bro will protect you like his own private parts.

34) When a promise is made, it shall be kept. And under no circumstances shall it be broken.

35) The way of the bro is sacred, cherish it like a sect or cult. The bro life is like being in Jedi training camp. You must always show your bro love and be joyous when bro love is shown to you.

36) Bro-mance is allowed but only among your tightest bros. Never take your bro-mance too far. And if anyone should remark negatively upon your bro-mance. An immediate beat down should ensue. Should a girl comment negatively upon the bro-mance, kindly explain to her that she will never know love from a man such as you and your bros share. And let her know what a privilege it is to be a mere witness to your glory.

37) The fist bump is a bro’s greatest weapon aside from the bro code itself. It should be used to show support, acceptance, pride, and it is an all around green light for an action that was committed. Use the fist bump often, and show constant appreciation for your bro’s jokes and skills with it.

38) Corollary to rule 37, the denial of a bro’s fist bump is a terribly powerful slap in the face. To deny a fist bump is no light thing, and should only be done when there is very great disapproval of an action.

39) Never refer to a bro by his last name, this is a sign of disrespect. Always refer to a bro by their name, nickname, or any standard bro word.

40) Standard bro names include but are not limited to; bro, dude, man, and anything with bro in it. (example: broham.)

41) Always respect a bro’s viewpoints about anything from politics to cars to religion. The only time a bro’s views do not matter is when they conflict with the bro code. If such a case should happen, the bro should be immediately evicted from the bro circle, until correctional actions have been made.

42) A bro should always treat for food when a bro is broke. Signs that a bro is broke are phrases like, “I’d rather eat at home”, “I’m not hungry”, “I just ate”, and finally “I’m trying to save money so ill eat at home.”

43) Similar to rule 42, when discussing the purchase of party beverages, if a bro declines to offer money. The other bros should cover for him. No bro should be denied thirst quenching goodness just because it’s a tight week or month.

44) A good bro will always encourage his bros to be an Alpha-Bro when it comes to talking to girls. If necessary demonstrations of your prowess may be made to give your bros something to work with.

45) A bro is only allowed to do really stupid things when he is really drunk. A bro may be denied further access to alcohol when it is obvious he has drunk too much already.

46) All things must be forgiven among bros, with the exception being your drunk bro feels up your girlfriend. This allows for an immediate punch to the face, but only after all other bros have been told and are gathered to watch the punishment. Before the blow is delivered, your drunk bro must have the situation explained to him. Because he is drunk, he will probably agree that he needs to be punched.

47) Under no circumstances should a bro ever be hit in the genitals for any reason. EVER!

48) You should only ever make fun of a bro for minor things that don’t affect their physical attributes. Example, dam man you got really goofy shoes.  The exception is for something that doesn’t exist, example; making fun of your friend for having man-boobs when he clearly doesn’t.

49) The only time that cockblocking is condoned by the bro code is when the designated cockblocker (aka the bombardier) has viable reasons to stop a bro from hooking up with a girl.

50) The Golden bro rule that everyone knows, Bros over hoes. This rule may be seasoned to taste by the bros themselves. Example; Bros over hoes except at the close. This rule of the bro code is what sets the male gender apart from the female gender. It is the very essence of the bro code, and embodies the true awesomeness that is bro love.

Hello everyone!

Welcome to my blog about the Bro Code. The blog will consist of the rules of the bro code, and everyday examples of Bro Code success and Bro Code failure. The Bro Code is not a known unbreakable list of rules, but more guidelines for living life that each bro seems to know. Like human intuition of what is right and what wrong. I hope you have some fun joining me in this study of male social hierarchy and respect of one another.